Archive for the ‘Articles: Family Matters’ Category

What happened to the Good Samaritan?

Sunday, April 25th, 2010

This is so sad… Check out this video and I bet you will be FIRED UP mad!! Here’s the summary: An unknown man saves a woman from being stabbed by an attacker and he himself is stabbed. He falls to the ground dying as dozens of people pass him by and DO NOTHING… What has happened to the Morals and Values of our society?

{Disclaimer: Parents-The following video has no violence in it but is not intended for children to watch}

Ok, some of you might not be moved by this video. You don’t know this guy so you are unattached to the situation. Let’s do a little paradigm shift… Now imagine that this was your brother, friend or family member. It feels a whole lot different now doesn’t it? When you feel close to the situation, you experience a paradigm shift and now you can embrace and understand how serious this problem really is.

The good news is… IT DOES NOT HAVE TO REMAIN LIKE THIS! WE CAN CHANGE! Here’s my favorite quote from Dr. Tom Mullins (pastor at Christ Fellowship church), “God specializes in things that seem hopeless!”. I truly believe that if we (as a society) focus on the Truth and what is in God’s word, we can change our society.  It is so important that we embrace Principles and Values in our own lives and it is equally important to teach our children God’s truth, morals and right principles so they can understand, early on, that IT DOES NOT HAVE TO REMAIN LIKE THIS! It starts with our example, our lives and then how we LEAD them down the right path!

Friends, Family, Sisters, brothers… I encourage you to be strong, be courageous and always seek the Truth so that you can properly Lead everyone around you (including yourself). I am still learning to daily implement these changes in my life, so let’s do it together!!

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The price of comittment

Saturday, March 27th, 2010

“How do you handle running 4 company’s, singing and leading worship AND taking care of your family?”

I made a commitment to myself, set a goal and I was going to stick to it! My commitment, during the next 5 weeks, is to workout 4 times per week at Hard Exercise Works (Cross-Fit/Navy Seal style training w/out the guns). My goal was to gain 5 to 10lbs of pure muscle mass. I have always had a difficult time gaining weight and my love for extreme sports and punishing workouts keeps me thin.

Thinking about the intense workout I was going to do the next morning at 8am, I started getting ready for bed. I actually put earplugs in my ears because our son (Robby) continues to wake up at 3am and his cry’s echo through the in-room monitor (which my wife sets at the highest volume level possible). The clock hit 11:30pm and I was in bed, finally falling asleep at midnight.

Two hours later… The in-room monitor projects Robby crying at FULL BLAST! I spring up and run upstairs to his room. The little guy is trying to get to his milk (we learned to leave in his crib). I hand it to him and leave the room, anxious to get back to sleep. Ahh, sleeping again! 4am rolls around and now a different cry is heard FULL BLAST! Our daughter Aria is crying and coughing (a croupy, barking cough). Those of you that are parents have probably experienced a child with a croupy cough. It is NOT FUN! Aria is scared and it sounds terrible. We pick her up, hold her, love on her and pray over her. She then sleeps between us in our bed.  All night she is coughing and crying (in between us) in the bed. Needless to say, 8am rolls around and NO WORKOUT!

This same trend in different circumstances and capacities happens all the time to us as husbands/wives and eventually as parents. It starts with the commitment to your spouse, which at times, means sacrificing things we used to do. Then we learn a new level of commitment when we have children. I love sitting with young entrepreneurs who have just had a child. They are so excited, worried and confused at the same time. They always ask, “How do you handle running 4 company’s, singing and leading worship AND taking care of your family?” This is my favorite question because it allows me the opportunity to speak about the ultimate sacrifice and commitment. As we approach Palm Sunday and ultimately Easter Sunday, I get choked up. I can hardly fathom that one man purposely and without hesitation, gave His entire life as a sacrifice for me… for you… for everyone! Seriously, talk about commitment! Jesus made the ultimate commitment, HIS LIFE, for OURS!

Every time I get upset about waking up in the middle of the night to take care of our children, doing an act of service for my wife, helping out a friend when it is not convenient or any other act of sacrifice, I try to remember the pain and sacrifice Jesus made for me. I can’t help but throw my arms up and praise His glorious intentions!! Oh the Wonderful Cross!! I can’t wait to sing & praise God this weekend at Christ Fellowship Church!

All those in the Palm Beach County area, I encourage you to join me and my family over the next two amazing weekends!

Easter at Christ Fellowship >> go here!

Happy Easter!! God LOVES YOU!!

In His Love,

Robert

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Expectations: The Key to Present and Future Relationships

Monday, September 7th, 2009

Expectations: The Key to Present and Future Relationships
Author: Robert W Wells
Published: September 07, 2009
For more articles: www.robertwells.com

The Key to Your Future

Let me take a moment to paint a picture for you. You have been working with a trusted colleague for over a year now. These days, you feel slightly disappointed by your colleagues’ behavior. You had high hopes for what you envisioned they would accomplish. You feel let down by their lack of zeal and motivation. Unconsciously, you start to act differently around them. Then one day, your colleague finally asks you, “What’s wrong?”. You really don’t know what to say because you never communicated your high expectations of them.

Picture number two… You are married…  You come home from a long strenuous day at work. Meetings all day and you even skipped lunch. You settle into your evening with your spouse and you notice the stack of unpaid bills is still sitting in the same spot. You become slightly upset and maybe even a little indifferent toward your spouse. The conversation goes something like this. “Honey, why are the bills still sitting in the same spot?”. Your spouse says, “Was I supposed to pay them today?”.

You can avoid major conflicts in your biz and family by Setting, Reviewing and Re-Setting expectations. These two scenarios describe a very common pitfall in business and at home. We all have hidden EXPECTATIONS of others. We don’t often communicate these expectations “out loud” which is why we are so often disappointed in others’ actions.

First, SET Reasonable Expectations. We all can get a little crazy when it comes to setting expectations for someone else. Try to have a little empathy and be realistic about the expectations you set. Do not set expectations that are unachievable. This is a recipe for disaster! Stay within  strength zones and maybe stretch them slightly. Remember to write down the expectations of both parties.

Second, on a regular basis, sit down and discuss (communicate) the expectations with the other person. Be proactive and loving. When you have expectations that both parties agreed to in writing, the conversation is pretty easy.  In business, I like to encourage my clients to create Performance Expectations and set up bi-annual Performance Review sessions. This stimulates a culture of productivity and accountability.  Take the time to review expectations. Simply go over what you discussed earlier and determine if expectations have been met.

If expectations have been met, Celebrate! When someone meets or exceeds expectations, it is a great achievement. It does not matter how big or small the expectation is. Take a moment to show your appreciation for this achievement.

If expectations were not met, don’t panic, don’t get upset. Take a moment to reflect on why the expectation was not met. Was it because the bar was set to high? Was it because the expectation was unrealistic, or was it because the other person simply did not meet the needs of the expectation. Once you discover the root cause of a failed expectation, you have the data to determine your next course of action.

Third, If the expectations have not been met and you understand the reason why, REVISE your expectations. Do not set the same expectations and assume they will be met. Revise the expectations and make them reasonable and achievable. Expectations are good and can be used to catapult the relationships in your business and personal life to another level.

“I’m a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.”   Thomas Jefferson

I don’t believe in luck but I love this quote from one of our Nation’s Founding Fathers. My interpretation of the quote is… we need to expect results when we spend focused time (working) on achieving results. I encourage you to explore the power of expectations. Spend focused time on Setting, Reviewing and Revising expectations with colleagues and family today.

Thank you for reading my thoughts on Expectations: The Key to Present and Future Relationships. I wish for you success in your business and more importantly in your personal and family life.

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Lessons Learned From My Children, Part 1

Tuesday, August 25th, 2009

Part 1, Lessons Learned From My Children
Author: Robert W Wells

Let me start by saying that I Love My Kids! My daughter is 2 1/2 and my son is 5 weeks young. Never in a hundred years did I think I would learn from them. My wife is a real blessing. I seriously don’t know how women can stay up all night feeding a baby and function at all the next day. I woke up three times during the night and slept about 3 hours total.

So, my story begins… this morning, as I walked up the stairs, peering through my slightly open eyes, I heard my daughter calling out from her crib, “dadddddy! Aria’s awake now! Daddddy!”. Obviously, she had a lot more sleep than me last night… ok, I confess, make that every night!

I picked her up out of her crib and she is more chipper than ever. She say’s “daddy, read book to Aria!”. At this point, I think I could possibly read a book (to myself) but not out loud. That’s waaay to much effort! I start reading to her and my eyes start to close. She proceeds to exclaim with authority, “daddy, open your eyes!” I open one eye and she says, “daddy, open BOTH eyes”, and she begins to peel open my other eye with her fingers. Her tenacity and passion is contagious so I start to wake up. My day as husband, father and business owner begins.

In the last 2 1/2 years as a father, I have learned some valuable lessons.

First, Passion and Excitement are Contagious! When my daughter gets excited about something, her passion for what she is doing is addictive & contagious. So contagious in fact, that even people around us who appear to be in sour moods, CHEER UP! Wow, I thought to myself… this is something I would love to bottle up and use in my businesses.

Now, Imagine bringing the Passion and Excitement of a child to the stakeholders and employees in your business. Try infusing Passion and Excitement into your meetings and conversations. Watch the dynamics of your culture change. Imagine the things you could accomplish!

Second, Diligence produces significant results. I have found the more time we spend with our kids, the more we mold and shape them. “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6) Don’t let society mold your kids, YOU mold them. Believe me, there have been plenty of times I had a meeting, a deadline or some other business activity that was urgent, but I made a conscience decision to prioritize my time for my children.

Here’s an example… My daughter loves to read, I mean she really loves to read. This love started very early. We rarely watch TV and are very selective of what our children watch. With that said, using books as our form of entertainment, we started teaching our daughter to read early. Now, at 2 1/2, she wants us to read her books all day long. We can tell that the books and our time with her have had a sizable impact on her intellectually. She can talk in sign language, uses reasoning to solve problems, counts to 20, says the whole alphabet, knows the days of the week and can string together full sentences and sing full songs… at 2 1/2 years young. Amazing! Of course, we didn’t make her into this superstar, God did!!! But, we have to take some credit. So, I am a firm believer that our Diligence & Time with her has produced significant results.

Now, Imagine pouring the same Diligence and Time into your business. Better yet, Imagine your employees pouring the same Diligence into your business. Spend some time putting together goals and objectives for your team. Have the team strive for specific goals. Tie a tangible reward to the accomplishment of these goals and watch your business change. Imagine the things you could accomplish!

To be continued in Part 2, Lessons Learned From My Children…

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